The performance that I kicked off my 26th year with!

This video is of a rehearsal we had to prepare for a repeat performance this past weekend. I met a whole slew of amazing dancers doing this, and learned a lot about movement and performance watching them. There is an INCONCEIVABLE amount of talent out here. I’ve got a long way to go, but this, I think, is a good start.

No, a GREAT start.

Also, I got to share the stage with some of my DC family again. It meant worlds to be up there with some of my closest friends. Proud. And so much love.

joesaralva:

Had the honor of performing for/with my friend Kevin (aka Tony Czar) in one of his own last pieces that he’ll be dancing in for awhile. Too much talent on one stage to name, even some from the DMV. See if you can name some of them.

I am now 26 years old.

The usual wavering: I’m so damn old / there are lots of people way, way older. 

In a world of dancers, I’m ancient. In the world of lives, mine is still budding.

The first thing I did on my birthday was dance. A longtime friend (who came to LA from DC before me, unintentionally paving a way) choreographed a beastly piece, and I had the privilege of sharing the stage with some of the industry’s most talented dancers; we (mostly he) let the dance world have it (time for fresh, for a refresh, for open minds and thirsty hearts. For re-evaluation of dancer-selves).

I was nervous. Nervous like a freshman dancer. That first year, every performance involved its own butterflies war. But by the last year, the fear left me. A good thing, or an indicator of too-comfortable, not enough challenge? Now, two and a half years later, stakes are higher. Tiny fish, HUGE pond. I rubbed my stomach all night, trying to massage the nervous out.

What happened on stage, happened; I can’t remember doing some moves, I’m not sure if my face was stone or not. Was my timing right? I won’t know until I see the video. But my heart felt right. Happiness followed me the rest of the night. It had FELT quality. When my body was moving, I’d felt at home. 

The rest of my birthday was wonderful. Love from friends, family, from my love. It’s nice to be reminded that you mean more to people than you sometimes realize. It’s nice (a privilege, a blessing) to have healthy, strong, deep family roots. December 7th, 2010 was a beautiful, full of moments-that-must-only-happen-on-your-own-special-day day. A day at the most magical place on earth, feeling unaccustomedly yet gladly warm for a December birthday. But the most important is this:

I started my 26th year dancing, sharing a stage with brilliance, feeling great.

___

Card and photo by Jordan Metcalf.

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Right now, I do. I really do.

sepiabeauty:

texturism:via thewakeup:cubeblog

Antii Dance

You know what “Antii Dance” looks like, right? Doesn’t matter if you got that extra “i.”

Miss you gurrr.

Here are more pictures of you.

Packrat

I have 378 blogs bookmarked on Delicious. There’s a solid chance that I’ve read only 35 of them in the past six months. But I still can’t delete the other ones. I’ve managed to throw out the clothes I don’t wear anymore; why are other people’s virtual lives so much harder to give up?

Early Thanks Giving

Yesterday was a rough day. I sat in a chair all day (freelance design job) which hurt my back which was already hurting from the monthly terror, I had cramps (I NEVER get cramps. What is UP, body?), and as the day went on I steadily deteriorated to the point where all I wanted to do (and actually DID do) was go home and curl up in bed. Except I didn’t want to go home because there’s so much drama and such an oppressive atmosphere there that I’ve been avoiding it as much as I can. 

Today, my body feels a little better, but still isn’t 100%. The home situation is the same, and I’m expecting a blow-up anytime now. And it’s a bit chilly outside. But for some reason a handful of good things popped into my head; so here I am, making a record.

• I have a skillset that I can bring in money with pretty much anytime, anywhere. Sure, I don’t make as much as a surgeon, but a surgeon can’t pursue a career in the arts while making money off his other passion.
• J’s family gave him a Kindle for his birthday. Everytime he talks about his new toy, he calls it “our new toy.” Heart of solid gold, guys.
• The sun’s out for the first time in what feels like 2 weeks. In reality, it’s been 2 days. But whatever. That’s forEVER in LA, right?
• I’m going to Hong Kong this winter. Again! Yes, spoiled. A dad who loves knowing that I love spending time with his mom. A granddaughter who loves and is amazed by her grandmother. And HONG KONG. A place I seriously can’t get enough of.

Ok now look. I know I’ve lived my life so far as a heterosexual, and am even in a loving relationship right now, but if either of these girls was to even say hi to me, I’d give up all intimate relations to be just their best friend.

Rino Nakasone Razalan and Maryss From Paris are two of the dopest female dancers I’ve ever seen. They pop, they lock, they break, they do funk like nobody’s business they wreck choreo, and oh, NOW THEY RAP (the original song is Jump by Kriss Kross. You have to watch).

Also, they’re best friends, and just the cutest, sexiest ladies y’all ever laid eyes on. They just ooze all KINDS of appeal.

I fell in love with them my senior year of HS, when I took their class in LA. And then they went on to great fame in the Beat Freaks (a whole group of amazing women), and they’re just more brilliant than ever and this video proves it. 

Two of my biggest dance inspirations here, yo.

(I count 4 different variations of “they’re just amazing” in this post. Redundant, but FORREAL GUYS!)

Wins The Race

Today, a good dance day was had. I’m getting back into the swing of things. My pickup is much improved (though still seriously needing work) and my groove is more than I had before (I think). These things are encouraging. I think maybe it was my own lack of conviction that’s impeded my growth thus far. My own head yelling louder than my heart, screaming at me to look around and see how far behind I was.

But today, I almost got a piece with impossible musicality. I may not have injected any style into it, but the moves I remembered.

Today, I grooved, extended, and used my entire body to be (pretty) clean in a really feel good piece.

Two classes, completely different styles, and yet I didn’t feel defeated when I left! This is a good sign. This is a very, very good sign.

Slow and steady.

On Loan Sharking

Here’s the situation:

I’ve found myself in a situation where it’s necessary to chase down individuals that owe me money. Not for business, but personal, purposes. The money I lent them allowed us all to have a place to live, and both individuals’ trustworthiness was vouched for by another of the roommates who also happens to be a good friend of mine. Turns out he had much, much more trust in them than they deserved and now, five months later, one of them still owes me (and the good friend) a good chunk of money. (The other one only paid me back after I bitched him out two days ago. I think I kicked him out, but whether or not he thinks I was serious is yet to be determined.) There were promises made all along the way—“I can pay you back $200 a week till I’m paid off,” “I’m getting a big check any day now, and I’ll pay you back completely with it,” etc—and not one of them was kept.

So now I’m stuck in quite the pickle. At which point do I have to stop being the bigger person? Do I even have to be a bigger person when it comes to money that came out of my (HARD-EARNED) savings account? I’m thinking it’s totally appropriate at this point to air the one person’s business out on Facebook (social embarrassment is pretty shaming, right?) or take him to small claims court (Judge Judy, here I come).

I’ve been pretty nice since the beginning, politely asking them if they had the money yet, courteously listening to their reasons excuses, but being firm in stating that I needed my money to pay my bills. The episode two days ago only came about after I learned that one of them was looking to make some pretty huge purchases (i.e. a CAR. Really?) while still owing me money. 

The other one has been kicked out already, and has now taken to ducking my calls and texts. 

Oh, and can we keep in mind that both these individuals are TWENTY-FOUR YEARS OLD? There’s no excuse to be a hot mess at this point in life, right?

I’ve never been in the position to be this big of a bitch to someone, but I think years and years spent maintaining a calm (ok, sometimes cowardly) temper is about to blow up in a big way. 

This doesn’t make me a bad person, does it?

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Even the by-products of artistic endeavors can be beautiful. This is what happened when I painted J’s niece for him on his birthday. Makes me happy.